Friday, June 6, 2008

An Open Letter to Billy Mays

Dear Billy,

I understand that you work hard to promote the (crap) products that you are expected to sell. I know you're a bigger name than I, and I can live with that, for the time being, at least. Still, I must put forth one request.

Please, for the love of that is holy, STOP YELLING!!! It's off-putting, rude, and annoying. Your and only your voice can wake me from a dead sleep, when I am then bombasted with advertisements about your products.

I don't care if they could raise the dead, or make me a high-powered attorney with a 6-figure income, I will never use your products. If, however, you can get me 7 figures, contact me. Let's talk.

Love,
Christine

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

At this point in my life, I'd settle for a nice, mid-5 figure job especially if it has benefits. But I'd still really like to be an attorney, which is why I put myself through this hell again and again. And I believe that deep down you think you'll be a good one two, which is why you're facing this monster again. If there's any silver lining, I haven't seen it yet. But I believe it's out there, and I thank you for reminding me it's there even if I can't see it yet.