It's Essential

If you know me or have spent any time around me, you might notice something a bit strange. I generally can hide it or make it seem minimal, but here's the truth - I shake. It's most noticeable when I've not had enough sleep, if I'm about to have an anxiety attack (being me ROX!), or if I'm awake.

A friend in law school pulled me aside one day and said, "Can I ask you a question? Why do you shake?" It was a particularly bad day that day, and I was quite grateful to have my laptop because sometimes it's hard to hold a pen. I told him that I didn't know what it was, but that both my mother and my grandmother shook, so I figured it was something genetic.

Now, with the help of the interwebs, I think I've figured it out: it's essential tremor. What a fantastic name, folks! Essential Tremor! Can't you picture the indie-rock kids just having a field day, or some art gallery exhibition that you'd be dragged to with that title?

It pretty much means that I shake and modern medicine doesn't know why. It doesn't hurt, it's not fatal, and it means that I get quite creative some days when I put on eyeliner. (Thank Christmas for the smudgy eyeliner brush!)

It's mostly with my hands, sometimes with other body parts, and it's quite embarrassing. It's not the DTs or any kind of withdrawal - and honestly, that's what most people think it is. It's not.

You know what one of the treatments is? Having a drink or two. That stops the shaking. And really, for the most part my shakes are minimal and barely noticeable. But some days, I look like I have Parkinson's. (OK, I'm overdramatizing, but it seems that way.)

So now you know.