Word Of The Year

Ah, thank ya, Mrs. Armstrong, for being able to get me out of both a bad mood and a writing slump. And for those of you who read both my site and hers, remember that the word you're looking for is INSPIRATION. Not that other word.

Anyhoo...

The other day I updated my Facebook status, commenting about being unfriended by a person who was subsequently suggested to me as a potential friend by said site. The debate moved from my personal pain to whether the correct terminology was "unfriend" or "defriend". Of course this got my weird little brain working.

To me, unfriending is a rapid process, not unlike ripping off a Band-Aid®. Perhaps the connection wasn't too strong, perhaps you never really liked the person you friended, perhaps you were looking for more entertainment, perhaps you were drunk and hit the wrong button. Doesn't really matter what the reason was; the point is, that person is (mildly) exterminated from your life.

Defriending, however, is a different matter entirely. In my mind, it means a slow, sometimes unnoticed exclusion of a person from your life. Something like the desalination process. You may still talk. You still care. Yet the friendship is ending. Somewhere in your head, you know it's true. You know that part of your intuition that wakes you in the night and says, quite clearly, "This isn't working"? That's the part I'm talking about.

And sometimes it's not that clear-cut. Yet if you pay attention, you see the end. It's sadder during and after the end. The person still remains of interest to you, but not to the extreme that you once cared.

Huh. Wonder if Webster's will pick up my distinction for next year.